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October 2008
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template Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls. Hit counter code here
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Sunday, October 26, 2008
3
What can possibly be on my mind at 6:30AM? Besides the fact that I'm growing weary of this insomnia. I want to write, but my brain refuses to function. My fears tell me I can't, yet I know that I can. I haven't completely explained myself. I wonder who really knows me? Does anyone actually know me?
Then that leads me to thinking what will the guy of my dreams think when he meets me? Am I going to live up to his expectation? But I don't need to live up to his expectation. Because I won't have to try with him. Things will just be natural with him. I wish there was a him. I wish there was some resemblance to a him. But I don't need a him. I just want a him. I'm growing complacent with my thoughts and feelings, and I don't know if I feel as if that's a good thing. Actually, how do I know if I am complacent if I'm not sure what it even means? It could mean I'm judgmental for all I know. I am working 30 hours this week. Yuck. I mean it's a good thing, but I'm just soo........ tired. It's the holiday season and they need me. So I'm working. I have the urge to be poetic but I know that won't happen. |