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My name is Felicia and my best friends mean the world to me.




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Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.

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Monday, January 26, 2009

Rejection
Saturday, January 24, 2009

I got my bedding this week. =]. Also my flat screen is mounted onto my wall.


We went to Wal Mart last night..... hehehe. gotta show you guys the video.

Monday, January 19, 2009





that's the engagement ring i want, if i ever got the choice.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Closed my eyes. Took a deep breath. I was just...free. I feel free. Nothing is weighing me down. I feel..... happier..

I know I feel happier. I know everything is going to be okay.

I haven't been there that much for Samantha in 2008, or much this year. As much as I WANTED to be there, some how I felt detached. I wanted to tell her everything, but I just couldn't.

She's my best friend, and I love her. But I just COULDN'T talk to her. Something was keeping me from her. And it was breaking my heart. I was going through something that I didn't know I was going through.

I don't know if I'm still going through it, but I'm getting through it. I know this, cause for the first time in a long time I thought "OH MY GOSH! I HAVE TO TELL SAM!" and it was just "I love my job soo much." I just wanted to like hug her and talk to her and everything.

I wanted to draw kangraroos and write notes to her and then scan them like we used to. I wanted to do all this stuff that i knew would make her smile, but would also make me smile.

I know this doesn't make sense, but at the same time.. I don't care. I'm SOOO happy, and I don't know how I got THIS happy.

I just can't stop smiling. I hope I'll have more days like this.

I know mine and Sam's friendship isn't perfect, long ways from being perfect. But i love her and she loves me and she puts up with my bullshit.

I don't like making her sad, and I know I hurt her alot... but I reallllyyy want to change that. I HATE hurting her. I really do.. so I am going to write her a note.....every day. Maybe some days it'll just be "Ily and miss you" but still...

Or I might start a journal.... and then when i've finished it.... mail her it....
Thursday, January 1, 2009

I had a weird dream. It was.......random....

I had a dream that I had gone to Rhode Island and met, um, Maggie* some singer's (that we all know of) girlfriend.


The dream wasn't about him, but about her. We went grocery shopping in the dream.

We just hung out.


I used to not like her, but after my dream I'm glad he's with her. Took them long enough to date.

I looked at her funny. "So how long have you two been dating?" I asked. I knew they were dating. She wants to admit it. But he keeps her a secret. A badly hidden secret.
"A little over a year now." she blushed.
I smiled. I wonder how many of his "songs" he sings to her.
Oh well...... she was the one voice he heard apparentally.


*- Name has been changed.